Ugly Is Relative

 



     When I was in elementary school, ugly was usually a term describing my rude behavior towards my elder aunt who smelled like old fur. When I was a teen, it was a word that described the girls who would not date me, which was most of the girls in high school. In my late twenties, it was reserved for certain women I encountered in social bars….until I had my ninth beer, at which time they all miraculously turned into prom queens for the rest of the night. Then, once I was married and in my forties, ugly people were who ever Wifey designated as crude, skanky or less than a size 9. I also observed that those wandering lost in their fifties, and on the abyss of ugliness, sometimes found themselves standing in line for a Botox fix to prevent their faces from melting down their necks like a cheap Christmas candle.
  
     In the wilderness of my sixties, ugly has taken on an entirely different dimension. It now ranges from cute to self-regurgitation. No matter how ugly a new born may appear to the world of optometrist, it’s still as cute as a bug’s butt. Today’s children usually don’t acquire facial torment until they plunge into their adolescent years and start wearing facial ornaments that look like they came from their dad’s toolbox. After being married as long as I have, I can no longer see the faults, disruptions and genetic flaws of my dear wife and beneficiary. She looks as beautiful and vibrant as the night I first met her in “Snooky’s” bar. So….I now gauge ugly and beauty against the example set by my Aphrodite wife. Yep, everything is beautiful now.

                                                                                                               Charlie

To leave a comment, please sign in with
or or

Comments (33)

  1. timholzbaur

    Ugly is as ugly does…..

    September 02, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      ….and it does very well sometimes.

      September 02, 2014
      1. timholzbaur

        Indeed.

        September 02, 2014
  2. WalkinOnSunshine

    I try to never comment when someone asks me “isn’t he/she ugly?”, because the “next time” it might be about me.

    September 02, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      Ugly is suppose to be a state of mind….and I’ve seen some really ugly minds.

      September 02, 2014
  3. SEC

    beauty is skin deep? but ugly – - – -

    September 02, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      Like an alligator’s hide.

      September 02, 2014
      1. SEC

        September 02, 2014
  4. keepingitreal_13

    Well most of the ugly people i know ARE relatives. But they think i’m a ugly duck as well so we are even.

    September 02, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      The longer my in-laws visit the uglier they get.

      September 02, 2014
  5. Waasyon

    Probably the most romantic post i’ve read in ages, ;bows;

    September 02, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      A regular Don Juan of inter-netdom

      September 02, 2014
  6. just0ne

    Right on sir!

    September 02, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      Well thank ya…..

      September 02, 2014
  7. sweetpaws

    you calling my relatives ugly? If ugly is relative I mean/

    September 02, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      We must be related then.

      September 02, 2014
  8. Bettymom

    That’s just lovely, U.C. I think my husband looks as good now as he did when we got married. Sometimes it helps to have really bad eyesight, though.

    September 02, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      I ‘see’ what you mean.

      September 02, 2014
  9. cjb321

    Ugly is all in the mind….not the body. smiles

    September 02, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      There are some really ugly minds out there.

      September 02, 2014
      1. cjb321

        I know! sigh

        September 02, 2014
  10. TinkerHale

    I believe as we get older, we do see things very differently from when we were in our 20’s and trying to keep our raging hormones under control while we chose only those who were physically beautiful. My husband once said to me, “I’m not a handsome man,” yet he has such a beautiful light in his eyes that I can see clear down to his very soul. He was always told that he was “cute” which in his mind meant that he didn’t measure up to the other so-called good looking guys. There is a beauty of spirit that goes far beyond the physical attributes of a person and to me, it means so much more. Enjoyable post…

    September 02, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      So true. A beautiful spirit never ages.

      September 02, 2014
      1. TinkerHale

        September 02, 2014
  11. Toni55

    I so agree with Tinnker….beauty of spirit is the most beautiful thing, sadly a lot of younger people (including a lot of young bloggers here ) do not realize this!

    September 02, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      Only when you’ve seen a lot of life, that you truly witness what beauty and true ugliness can be.

      September 02, 2014
      1. Toni55

        Amen, Uncle Charlie, Amen

        September 02, 2014
        1. uncle_charlie

          The truth hurts Toni….being cute like you and me ain’t easy.

          September 03, 2014
      2. uncle_charlie

        Nope….just bumped my head one day and all this wisdom came to me…..sort of.

        September 03, 2014
  12. salty_dawg

    Ugly is most certainly my relative….and I inherited it all!

    September 03, 2014
  13. tulakrystal

    I think that my sweet boyfriend is still handsome after 15 years. I love the way he smiles and is in general.

    September 07, 2014
  14. drivefaastakechances

    I work with some ugly people and I volunteer with and for some of the most Beautiful people. Your words, here I have read, make such an impact—I now know a little bit of Uncle Charlie and what everyone speaks of with such gratitude and respect. Thank you, dear man, for being “here” right where someone like me could find your inspiring words.

    September 08, 2014