Incoming Call........................scribbles and bits 104

Incoming Call

 

 

     Jake was on his knees weeding his ‘recession garden’ when he received a minor shock to his brainstem. His cereb phone was still set for 'cortex zap' as he had forgotten to put it on genital buzz. He sat back on his heels and pulled his right glove off. Inserting his index finger up his right nose hole, he activated the cereb phone and took the call.

     “This is GOPHER_BOY_22”, he announced.

     “Jake? This is Willy,” came a clear voice through his cranium.

     “Willy??”

     “You know, SMUCK_A_DUCK. I need your help, right away.”

     “Never heard of your ID, goodbye.”

     “NO WAIT! You and I once worked together on the Chelsea Clinton campaign!”

     “Oh God….you’re right. You’re the guy who tattooed his entire body black…..right?”

     “Yep, that’s me. I was deleting some old cortex files when your avatar and number scanned by. I immediately blinked it back and thought I’d give you a buzz and see what’s what since the election.”

     Jake remembered Willy only in the vaguest sense, much like remembering an old foot rash from years ago. As he continued to weed around the turnips and marihuana, he continued the conversation. “So, what have you been up to sense the election?”

     “Well, I worked as a platonic intern for President Clinton until the scandal over her secret negotiations to sale California and Texas to Mexico blew her administration apart. After that, I moved on and found work with the PR staff at one of  Microsoft’s medical clinics. Did a lot of copy work and writing commercials for the new Microsoft Nirvana brainstem implants. But what about you? I remember you had two teens, how are they doing?”

     “Juno’s 16 and just got out of ‘Minecraft’ rehab a few weeks ago and he’s slowly gaining his recognition of family again. My daughter Goga recently turned 14 and she’s been wearing a full, tie-dyed burqa for the last year. She wants to be one of the 72 virgins before she reaches 16, after that she wants to be hooker with a reality show.”

     “I’m telling you, Jake, these kids are something else. My 15 year old son just learned to sign his name and recently learned the 12 letters of the alphabet. Most likely will graduate this year when he qualifies for the Federal Indigent Program. I’m very proud of him, as is his real dad. Well, my signal is wimping out on me and I don’t have a spare battery suppository, so, I’ll just say adios and maybe we’ll meet up at a soup kitchen some evening.”

     “Yep, that would be nice, Willy. You take care my friend.” Jake then took a deep snort, which disconnected the cereb call. As he continued to work his garden, he thought about all the wonderful changes he had seen in his life and the contentment they had brought him. Then his genitals started to buzz.....














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Comments (25)

  1. Bettymom

    You and I see the future differently, but the same. I love the 12 letters of the alphabet. That’s all kids need to text anyway, I think!

    August 07, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      At my age, I’ve forgotten most anyway.

      August 07, 2014
      1. Bettymom

        What – most of the alphabet? I wonder which 12 letters they will keep.

        August 08, 2014
        1. uncle_charlie

          What ever it takes to spell ‘four letter’ words.

          August 08, 2014
          1. Bettymom

            I should have known. That does narrow it down a lot.

            August 08, 2014
  2. pastormike

    hopefully I’ll be in the big condo in the sky before it comes to pass…

    August 07, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      I have no problem leaving it all behind.

      August 07, 2014
      1. pastormike

        can’t really lose. just about anything will be an improvement..

        August 07, 2014
  3. WalkinOnSunshine

    I knew technology was taking over the world, but this is the ultimate. Brilliant write Wish there would have been 12 letters when I was growing up

    August 07, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      Yep….too many letters and too many wasted words.

      August 07, 2014
  4. sweetpaws

    we are almost there

    August 07, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      Just around the corner.

      August 07, 2014
  5. cjb321

    Wow. So THIS is what we can look forward to. Very good, as always! lol

    August 07, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      I think my brain phone has static.

      August 07, 2014
      1. cjb321

        hahaha

        August 07, 2014
  6. TomasSISI

    Stop the world, I want to get off.

    August 08, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      The line forms here!

      August 08, 2014
  7. funfreak

    Call me crazy, but I think that buzzing genital thing is really going to take off.

    August 08, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      Only takes a moment…….to answer, that is.

      August 08, 2014
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    August 08, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      Go away.

      August 10, 2014
  9. vis4

    good job.

    August 10, 2014
    1. uncle_charlie

      Thank ya friend.

      August 10, 2014
  10. uncle_charlie

    Glad you visited me.

    August 10, 2014